When you have a "I Hate My Job" day, try this. On your way home from work, stop at your pharmacy and go to the thermometer section and purchase a rectal thermometer made by Johnson and Johnson. Be very sure you get this brand.

When you get home, lock your doors, draw the curtains and disconnect the phone so you will not be disturbed. Change into very comfortable pajamas and sit in your favorite chair, carefully open the package and remove the thermometer.

Now, carefully place it on a table or a surface so that it will not become chipped or broken. Now the fun part begins - Take out the literature and read it carefully. You will notice that in small print there is a statement, "Every rectal thermometer made by Johnson & Johnson is personally tested."

Now, close your eyes and repeat out loud five times, "I am so thankful that I do not work for quality control at Johnson and Johnson."

Now, have a nice day and remember, there is always someone else with a job that is worse than yours.

All right, now, if you are very (like very, very, very) bored, try peeping into the Monk's Mind. It's an amazing game, and you'll have a great time!

Tell us (be honest fella), do you like what you do? Or do you do what you like?

Hopping around my small blogosphere, I found a good article on positive thinking that Monica has harvested from some farm on the web.

The article is good, and really helps push limits at keeping a halcyon and positive temperament. The in-a-capsule formula to being positive is:

• Look for positive people to associate with.
• Look for one more interesting idea.
• Find one more concept important to you.
• With every friend, explain a new idea you've just learned.
• Ask questions.
• With yourself, keep a list of your goals, positive thoughts and actions.
• Remember, you are what you think, you feel what you want

The last point is the ace that you should sneak up your sleeve, so that it's a winning game time and again, even with a new deck of circumstances every day.

We meet people everywhere. We meet them at malls, movie halls, subways, parties, consortiums and almost every other place you can think of (even the restrooms, yes).

And if you are one of those who keep meeting many people because of your interest or profession, it is very likely that you do not recollect names of people that seem to know you very well.

In a later post, we will learn about hacks to memorize (and never forget, yipee!) names. In this post, however, we will try to understand ways in which you can extract the name of a person, who has confronted you at a social gathering and has struck a conversation with you.

I came up with an easy list of actions to help to get his name out, without letting him know you don't recall. This may or may not work depending on how lucky you can get.

Here is the list:

1. Act stable. Don't let the person know you don't recall. A sudden flush of expressions, or that blank stare, can give it away. Act as if you have known him for ages.

2. Ask-the-emailaddress hack. After a small discussion about how each one of you have been, pop out a piece of paper or notebook and a pen, or a PDA, or a cellphone—whatever you fancy. Ask him, "Hey, gimme your email address, y'know it's good to stay in touch!". If he says, amit at deshpande dot com, or meetjohn at yahoo dot co dot uk, you are lucky. If he says something else, go on to step 3.

3. Probe your mind for the initials. He says apd at metempsychose dot net or pk at underived dot net, and you know that this person's name has the initials apd or pk or whatever he tells you. Now try figuring out if that rings a bell. Just think "a... a... a...". Amit should pop.

If you need to concentrate take a break to powder your nose, or to rush to the restroom (let's hope you don't meet another Mr. Noname there!) and think hard and loud. "d... d... d... deshpande!". You got it again. If it's too hard to get it, don't worry. Step 4 will tell you an alternative hack.

4. Introduction hack. If you are at a party, introduce Mr. Noname to somebody whom you already know, like Ms. Isha, and say,

"This is Isha!", and smile and talk something to Isha, like , "How have you been?".

Now sit(stand) back and watch. Isha will definitely tell you how she has been. And then she will realise that She doesn't know Noname's name. She may ask, "What's your good name?" or "Hey, I didn't get your name!"

Here you need to listen (LOL, that was obvious, if you are not a sack of stones) and Bingo! He says, "The name's Bond, James Bond!"

5. Business card hack. This works if you are at a bar, or a park, where you don't know many people. So, the Introduction hack will not work. To use the Business Card hack, ask him "Hey, where are you working now? Can I have your business card?". Considering you came to this world with your share of luck, he will pull out one. Read the name.

6. I-am-bad-at-names hack. If you couldn't get the name so far, your last resort should be to admit it. Tell him you are very bad with names. Or that you have partial memory lapses, and tomorrow you will recall his name, but not now. Ask for the name.

That's easy. No?

Aryabhatta once said "What's in a name? That which we call a rose, by any other word would smell as sweet."

Well, was it Shakespeare by any chance? Whatever... What's in a name?

I was talking (chatting actually) to a friend over meebo (check it out, it's amazing). I was pondering about what can be added to MetaMorf to make it a much more exciting experience for you (yes you reading this).

I thought about adding more dialogue with you. Dialogue that's relevent to each one of us. Our lives. I thought about howtos, recipes, sharing stuff, lifehacks and stuff from all you guys out there. I want to improve our conversation and make MetaMorf a richer community.

To begin with I found a partial list of tips to improve conversations from Dave:

1. Whether you are religious or not, tell yourself that God is speaking to you through the other person.

2. Imagine yourself in a game with the following rule: "Whoever talks first loses."

And I added more to it:

3. Add trust by looking the person in the eye. You may want to decide how much you do it depending on what relationship the person has with you. Don't make your boss feel barbecued.

4. Let your body do the talking. Hello... Whats with the pelvic movements? I didn't(please sit down!) mean that!

Use gestures and expressions to add impact. Say "It was so high that..." with raised eyebrows and "Just a small bug..." with a holding-a-pin gesture.

5. Listen.

6. React when listening. This is helpful when you want to let the person know whether you agree or not. Nod, or cross your eyebrows periodically.

7. Stroke your chin or beard to *show* that you are pondering. (This holds good for business discussions)

Now, Do you have ideas that improve the quality of your conversations? If so, please take a moment and share it with other MetaMorfers. Yes, you!

Thanks to you all for adding to the list on improving conversations. Keep commenting and adding till we have enough and I will republish the list with all the points. This is productive collaboration. Or should I say, collaborative productivity? Good goin' Folks!

This post may not last long. After writing, I decided this is going to be just a temporary fizzle.

I thought I'd not get a chance to push a post at all on this warm day. Yes, as they say, love is in the air.

Some have looked forward to this day to flaunt their significant others, and some to hold their head high for the pride of treading it solo.

I have tripped many a times, and stood up and dusted my posterier everytime. Now the journey has become so precocious that I hardly trip.

Earlier people pointed at my greased, frayed denim, and questioned "Where have you been? Who did that to you?".

I weathered them umpteen times. I took bites of wax apples. I liked art that was already sold. I took roads already travelled.

Now, I sit in a high-backed chair, keying silently with all my pride. I seldom wear denim. I indulge in speckless sartorial excellence. I hate all apples. Real or wax. I make my own art, so I don't have to buy. I make my own roads, and invite people to cruise.

I choose. I.

I am independent, the architect of my own destiny.

I choose my crime, and I choose my partners.

Truth is much more enticing than a dreamy valentines day.
Are you one of those who doesn't require a crutch because you can't cope with reality alone?

Update: PK has shared amazing information about Phone etiquette.

For all those who get turned on by gadgets and gizmoes(or is it gizmos?) and the slick iPod in particular, this one's for you. MetaMorf is witnessing the coinage of a new term called iPODiquette.

iPodiquette = iPod + etiquette

If you can manage the iPod-induced hearing problems, you will still see eyebrows being raised at office spaces for your obsession with your prized possesion.

Some "watch-your-stepisms"(coinage again, the mint is on steroids) from USATODAY:

• Let others know you're putting your iPod on to concentrate on work -- that it's your "no distraction" time, (etiquette consultant Hilka) Klinkenberg said.

• If a worker approaches you, take earbuds out of both ears. Even if your iPod is off, having an earphone in even one ear is still disrespectful, (etiquette consultant R.R.) Smith said.

• Absolutely no singing, head bopping or banging -- or bringing the iPod to meetings, she added.

Folks, are you listening? ;)

He knew that the days ahead would be difficult. There were questions to be faced and a plan of action to be prepared. He knew that he should think about it. He knew also that he would not think, because everything was clear to him already, because the plan had been set long ago, and because he wanted to laugh.

He did not laugh as his eyes stopped in awareness of the earth around him. His face was like a law of nature -- a thing one could not question, alter or implore. It had high cheekbones over gaunt, hollow cheeks; gray eyes, cold and steady; a contemptuous mouth, shut tight, the mouth of an executioner or a saint.

— FountainHead, Ayn Rand

I recently learnt that Bill Gates, the world's richest man, said the tax office in the US has to store his financial data on a special computer because his fortune is so vast.

Thinking about this at the local tea-stall, I come across yet another website that blew me away.

It was too much in one day, learning about the world's richest man, who can scare the hell out of number-crunching machines, just by pulling out some dollar bills out of his pocket. Whew! And that he is dead? Yikes!

I just crumpled the tabloid and with a spinning head and clenched fists, sat there.

"Saab, Kya hua saab?" the Chaiwallah asked with surprise.
"Kuch nahee Billu, ek mast adrak chaai dena yaar, saala headache pain horela hai!"